I am Piggy
by VioletIceKitty
Summary: When Piggy first meets Gir, he doesn't know what to expect. Then when Gir takes Piggy home, well things just get stranger and stranger.


So there I was, sitting in a tree just minding my own little piggy business; when out of nowhere I hear this noise. This noise that went something like this: " taco! Taco! Taco! Oooooh! Piggy!"

I froze. Because truth be told, I am a pig. My name is Piggy the 3rd just for future reference. The owner of that voice must have seen me sitting here.

I tried to use my magical Piggy-Powers to fly away, but they didn't seem to be working that day. I heard a squeaky noise then, and turned to see what I can honestly call the strangest creature I've ever encountered. It was some kind of a creature wearing a stuffed animal costume. The costume was a green…..dog? I'm not sure if that can be considered a dog costume or not. It sure was cute though.

This….creature was perched on the tree branch next to me with its tongue hanging out. I stared at it, for I have very stubby arms, and a fairly *cough* round body. That, in fact, makes it very difficult for me to wave, run, or anything else in that general area of motion.

"I'm Gir!" the creature said "Will you be my friend?"

I blinked.

"Yippy!" Screamed the creature..err…Gir. "Let's go to my house Pig!"

I didn't want to go to Gir's house. Not really. I do admit I was a bit curious as to where such a creature would come from. But I certainly didn't want to go to it's house! I didn't know what to say, I mean…I'm a pig and there's not a lot we pigs can say to any creature other than our own kind. So I did the only thing I could think to do. the only way I could communicate with this…Gir.

I blinked in protest.

Obviously Gir had never heard the language of the blink, and he picked me up. that's right, that strange…animal? Yes I'll say animal till I find out the truth about what this Gir thing really is. This animal picked me up, held me high above…his? Is it a he or a she? It seems like it's a guy. He picked me up & held me directly above his head.

He then proceeded to jump out of the tree, and run screaming across the park we had been in. He kept doing that for several yards until he got to an open area with a surprising lack of humans around. Then, get this, Gir jumped in the air & began FLYING. I kid you not, he was flying! This strange thing, which I can no longer dare to refer to as an animal, had rockets stuffed in its feet. I assume that's what was causing it to fly with me. If not, than his feet had so unfortunately caught on fire while he was flying. I don't know about you, but I'm sticking to option number one & saying he was flying with rocket feet.

Now I sincerely hope I don't sound too completely insane right now. But I can assure you, that this is no tall tale, everything I have told you, and will tell you, is one hundred percent true facts of this strange day of my life.

We soon arrived at this little multi-storied shack looking house. It can only be described in the same way I thought of Gir when I first met him. It was abnormal. This was the weirdest house I had ever seen. It was uneven & oddly coloured. One of the strangest things about this house, is the fact there were huge thick wires coming out of Girs' house that were stabbed into the houses next to it.

I wondered causally if the neighbors even noticed these huge wires. Humans were so stupid. Let me just say, that if you are a human who is reading this, I apologize, but the general population of humans on earth these days…are imbeciles. All humans, that is with the exception, of course, of any of those who know what all of the words mean that us intelligent Piggy's use in our everyday vocabulary.

Gir opened the door of this freak of a house & ran inside. The room we were now in was some kind of living room. It had a huge television and a picture of everyone's favorite actor, the scary monkey. He stars in one of the best TV shows out there called "The Scary Monkey Show" and let me tell you, if there's anyone in the world who deserves their own TV show, it's the scary monkey.

On the couch sat a little green man. He had huge pink eyes & a concentrated look on his face. He was another weird thing I had incountered today. The strangest thing about this one was the fact he- I'm assuming it was a he because of when I later heard his voice- was wearing a dress. Not just any dress, a pink dress. This day just kept getting stranger.

"GIR!" shouted the green headed boy in the pink dress "Why have you brought that filthy thing in here?" he better not have been referring to me! Just because I'm a pig, does not mean I am dirty in any way.

"This is Piggy! He's gonna be my friend!" Gir said.


End file.
